A Personal Story About Binge Eating Disorder
"I might die if I eat food." "I might die if I eat." Both statements were close to reality for me as I silently tormented to think that for my takeaway hell could.
Why do I want to write my story and my personal information with the world? Since I have something important to say, and I learned that, not to mention healing Binge Eating other disorders that may stay there forever if they did not really necessary.
My experience with eating disorders to anorexia began when I was 16 years. Growing up I was always conscious of my body, though I have normal size and weight. But as a "normal" is not a pile of beans if you do not feel inside. This is just outside. My grandmother told me when I said I was bad eating fatty foods "and thoughts were the start of a vision of unhealthy food. I took her conviction that I would get fat, I was afraid of food, and afraid of being fat.
As we age, I have always been an unhealthy relationship with food at arm's length. With 22 years I was married, and 25 I had my first daughter. At 27, I left my husband, I do not have to live with fraud and corruption, which is filled, which had received live my husband. He had embezzled money from the police, he worked for the debt and I did not. I could not believe my husband, who claims he wants to love me would make me more responsible for his misconduct. Has he ever really loved?
Although I was 3 months pregnant with my second child, I was 2 years and left with a broken heart. He cared about me, my 2 years old and my unborn child and my low self-esteem. In the three weeks that followed, I lost my job, I lost my grandfather, I lost my marriage and I lost my child in harm unborn children. My life will never be the same.
At first, I ate as a consolation. I had almost lost everything in my life I have been great and the food seemed to soothe my soul. I was sad, angry, sadness, pain and loneliness. Several months passed and I started to get back together in the interest of my daughter. I started a diet and exercise, because in my twisted mind I thought that nobody would want me if I looked like a Skinny Model in a magazine. I was 27, divorced, and has always been one of 2 years. What man wants to be involved with a woman like me?
I started to die of starvation and compulsive exercise and weight just melted from my body. Of course, my muscles and immune system. But I am not worried, because my body was reacting to the command I wanted to have on them. I could not control what was happening in my life, but I'm sure I could control my own body.
My family was in the neighborhood, an intervention, as I pushed my body through healthy boundaries. I smoked cigarettes, I would not eat, and even compulsive exercise. My lungs screamed at me, but I pushed. My knees have finally given to overexploitation and then I was forced to cease exercising obsessively. My body was trying to take control of my brain and still is with methods of stopping. It finally happened. I am amazed when I think now about how brilliant the human body and how it sends messages when the brain is not listening!
In the meantime, I started again and found I was still attractive to men, even with a child in tow. My confidence seemed a little better, but the food was a problem. I barely ate and smoked. I did not address the underlying issues of abandonment of my marriage, then there was emptiness in my heart.
A few years later I met my current husband I was ready. I waited 7 years after my divorce to meet him, freed the pain I felt inside, and he was like a prince fairy tale. It seemed that my life had become for the better and I fell madly in love with him. We plan our wedding and building a house at the same time, so my stress level was enormous, but I was on a cloud.
Here, the interesting thing is an eating disorder. Even if you feel euphoric satisfied, you can always internal struggles, such as those based eating disorders emotions. Because I do not deal with the questions, I started to binge eat. I fight my stress food. And, of course, as I have a full Binger, I had to hide, what I did. As I was ashamed and embarrassed that I'm this horrible person who hid the cake in the bottom of the fridge and stuffed me so full I could barely move after it became. And to top it off, I started gaining weight.
After three years of hiding my cravings, I "came out of the closet. Binge eaters hide their pain in general and then out of all foods is scary, but liberating. Another thing that happened when I decided to stop hiding, finally, that I wanted my eating disorder to heal as quickly as possible. I needed a way out of this disease and I wanted to find.
I went to Overeaters Anonymous meetings for some time, but they were of no help to me whatsoever. My experience with OA has been a handful of people gathered at the local church and has served on the way she emphasizes. Nobody knew how to treat binge eating. We do not know how to cure them. In fact, whenever I went to a meeting I had to give a name and I am a compulsive eater. I do not think it was the truth. I meant that I was cured. I am also tired of complaining to others. my next attempt to help was to call my doctor.
My PCP had no idea what was binge eating. She suggested that I join food a structured program like Weight Watchers. She thought I should try an antidepressant. She sent me home with prescription pills and a good dose of frustration. Did we do not know how to cure? What options do I have? It turned out, not much.
That's when I decided to study holistic health and nutrition. I realized that I sent on my way to eat a goal, and that other people find ways to cure their illness, when they finally reached the point, "Coming Out" has been .
Search the help I needed was a miracle. My recovery included: stress management, challenging my old belief system to get to the cause of my illness, learn meditation, visualization, and assertiveness and coping strategies. He came to me and nobody else. All my actions and decisions when I began to heal my illness, focusing on everyone except me. He realized how much I appreciate and have self-worth, and I can participate in life by telling me to stay true to themselves.
I learned that someone eating disorders, whatever may have their origin or income, or color. I learned that stress can literally be on the edge and run the binge eating and I do not know how to cope adequately with stress is part of the problem.
I also know that healing comes with the obligation to speak for me, so do not go the other wonderful people at home with a prescription for something that only masks the problem and it does not resolve. I urge people to learn about the disease, support, options online or offline and available to help. Binge eating disorder healing is possible. I'm living proof.
"My name is Nadine and I am a people healthy, happy beautiful.
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